The Rocking Chair

Ok, the secret is out...I am a sentimental person, especially when it comes to my babies. Contrary to that, I am also very serious about getting rid of clutter, or anything that is surviving in my house primarily to collect dust.  Everyone's heard of the disorder known as hoarding...well, if there is an opposite disorder in which one removes from the house as much as one hoards, than I have that disorder.  No not really, but almost.

On the other hand, I have kept, reused, washed and stored everything from my first baby shower with Austin until just recently, where I found myself in a battle between the sentiments and the "consinements."  What to keep, and what to give away to consinement?

There were toys not being played with, baby paraphernalia unoccupied, and clothes Ainsley and Austin had outgrown that all needed desperately to find a new home. (Obviously Ava's clothes will be keepers until Ainsley passes through them.) It all sounds so simple; get rid of what you dont need, and keep what you do.. right?  I'm sure every mother will understand what I am about to embark on....It is never easy to get rid of the unique things that were once a part of such a special era in the life of you and your child. This is the time that a mother's bond with her little person is the strongest.  With that, I have managed to get rid of what we dont need, epecially the items which can always find residence in another family's infant-bound home, and keep just a few things of sentimental worth.

Upstairs in my closet sits three boxes that I will one day give to each of my children. Enclosed in the boxes are the outfits they wore home from the hospital, some booties, a plush toy, and brush etc. Each box is intricately packed with items from their "baby-life." I too have a box for myself with a few things they wont miss ;-)

There is one larger baby item that I will never part with, even after they've gone on to college and started their own careers and families... it is my rocking chair.  This was something that was more mine then there's, but they all spent their share of time in it. Actually, some of the most significant times of bonding were spent in this chair -- precious, priceless moments, where I nursed and rocked my sweet little ones every night as they drifted off into dream land.

In, The Rocking Chair, I found time to pray over my babies for health, wisdom, and knowledge of God's love for them.  I prayed for patience for myself in caring for them and rest for both of us as the night tarried on.  As I rocked them, I would relish in the moment, memorizing every little thing about them, from the unique curves on their tiny faces to the distinct soft spots on their round little heads. When placed on my shoulder nothing was so sweet as the soothing sound of their breathing and little baby snores, it was always such a peaceful time of winding down after a very, very busy day (and increasingly busy with each additional child :-) And as I would lay them in to the comfort of their crib, I would take one last look before leaving the room in all of its peacefulness, and lift up a prayer to the Lord one more time to keep baby (A___) safe and sound through the night. Anyone who has ever experienced any of this knows the immensity of God's blessings.

I recently stopped nursing Ainsley shortly after her first birthday.  Making it to a year is not an easy task for me, but I will say that this transition was bitter-sweet, and though I would love to anchor in the baby years for the rest of my life, things must move on.  Babies become toddlers, and toddlers become rascals!  I look forward to this new stage of having three walkers, three self-feeders and better yet, three independent potty-users!  I can almost smell the freedom as Ainsley becomes more self-sufficient each and everyday!  And once they are too old to be rocked and have moved on to taste freedom for themselves, I will still have my chair. And even in their absence, I will still cradle their worries, cares, and tears in my arms as I pray over them each night in my rocking chair.